"I'm expecting my workplace to be totally fair and merit-based"
i don't know where you worked, but i have been working for a few decades now, and i still expect exactly that. even more so than school was. the point is, even if my expectations do not match reality everywhere, not expecting that would be like giving up. instead, because of this expectation, i do my best to create a work environment where this is actually true, and i do not allow others unfair behavior deter me from my belief and expectation of fair treatment of everyone around me.
I'll bet we agree more than you think. Understanding reality isn't the same as capitulating to it. Correct expectations can help you push back more effectively than constantly having your (overly-optimistic) hopes dashed. ie, I'm not just saying "everything sucks, be cynical."
i don't know where you worked, but i have been working for a few decades now, and i still expect exactly that. even more so than school was. the point is, even if my expectations do not match reality everywhere, not expecting that would be like giving up. instead, because of this expectation, i do my best to create a work environment where this is actually true, and i do not allow others unfair behavior deter me from my belief and expectation of fair treatment of everyone around me.