I kinda want something which just treats XML as a dumb tree definition language... give me elements with attributes as string key/value pairs, and children as an array of elements. And have a serialiser in there as well, it shouldn't hurt.
Basically something behaves like your typical JSON parser and serialiser but for XML.
To my knowledge, this is what TinyXML2 does, and I've used TinyXML2 for this before to great effect.
That's what you call a DOM Parser - the problem with them is, as they serialize all the elements into objects, bigger XML files tend to eat up all of your RAM. And this is where SAX2 parsers come into play where you define tree based callbacks to process the data.
Depending on the XML structure and the servers RAM - it can already happen while you approach 80-100 MB file sizes. And to be fair, in the Enterprise context, you are quite often not in a position to decide how big the export of another system is. But yes, back in 2010 we built preprocessing systems that checked XMLs and split them up in smaller chunks if they exceeded a certain size.
Basically something behaves like your typical JSON parser and serialiser but for XML.
To my knowledge, this is what TinyXML2 does, and I've used TinyXML2 for this before to great effect.