Are (self hosting) people putting multiple services like Django app, Postgres, Redis etc into a single container/lightweight VM instead of using Docker Compose with single-purpose containers?
You don’t have too, as you can create a single posgres instance for your services.
I prefer Incus, because you can’t do adhoc patching with docker. Instead you have to rebuild the images and that becomes a hassle quicky in a homelab settings. Incus have a VM feel while having docker management UX.
