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Fittingly enough, the Rationalist community talks about this a lot. The canonical article is here ("I can tolerate anything except the outgroup").*

The gist is that if people are really different from us then we tend to be cool with them. But if they're close to us - but not quite the same - then they tend to annoy us. Hacker News people are close enough to Rationalists that HN people find them annoying.

It's the same reason why e.g. Hitler-style Neo Nazis can have a beer with Black Nationalists, but they tend to despise Klan-style Neo Nazis. Or why Sunni and Shia Muslims have issues with each other but neither group really cares about Indigenous American religions or whatever.

* https://slatestarcodex.com/2014/09/30/i-can-tolerate-anythin...






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