I'm a lonely computer nerd, and yet despite having made a lot of friends on the internet in my youth, I'm no longer willing to do so. The internet has gotten too weird and polarized, and quite frankly I don't like the people who share my interests. Most nerds are living in fantasy worlds, not just part-time.
The problem is one of degrees - Anyone you notice on a big site is likely posting very often - "Terminally online" is the word. The more niche you go, they are alternatively deeper into their own fantasy worlds. I haven't figured out how to arrange coincidence; Repeated coincidental meetings have long been studied to be the basis of friendship, and intentionally going to "meetups" where the attendance is common but not fixed is the best way to foster that.
Online matchmaking has been the biggest problem here - You are guaranteed a game, but you'll never run into the same people twice. Once upon a time you had localish communities form around servers that were low-ping to them, which really worked well - You were likely to run into the same people, and they were likely to be nearby but not so close that you'd have run into them anyway.
Unless you're living in the middle of nowhere and the only people you're close to are the ones you have nothing in common with. Besides superficial characteristics like ethnicity and language. These threads are a blessing for some of us.
The problem is one of degrees - Anyone you notice on a big site is likely posting very often - "Terminally online" is the word. The more niche you go, they are alternatively deeper into their own fantasy worlds. I haven't figured out how to arrange coincidence; Repeated coincidental meetings have long been studied to be the basis of friendship, and intentionally going to "meetups" where the attendance is common but not fixed is the best way to foster that.
Online matchmaking has been the biggest problem here - You are guaranteed a game, but you'll never run into the same people twice. Once upon a time you had localish communities form around servers that were low-ping to them, which really worked well - You were likely to run into the same people, and they were likely to be nearby but not so close that you'd have run into them anyway.