Remind them when they inevitably forget. Unless they remember, then they get tipped more. I hadn't thought of following them to the kitchen....maybe next time. ;)
I get that you’re joking but the underlying point is that there’s only so much you can control without doing the job yourself.
With the builder - yep, told him we don’t need the stud wall. Met him every morning to discuss issues and progress. I start taking notes and sending them post meeting. Did not talk about stud wall because it’s no longer being done. 2 weeks later, stud wall appears. Sigh. Ask him to remove stud wall.
He tries makes me feel like it’s my fault, but fails.
I spent a lot of time in middle management. I simply got used to tirelessly repeating the same thing over and over. I don't do any of the work, just the reminding/nagging. Is it foolproof? No. But generally the major things are done right.
I just moved into a remodel that I checked daily for a year. The major stuff is done (mostly) right, but things inevitably went wrong. In particular when new staff or other crews were involved.
Stay the course. Even if it's your fault (which you can never admit as it will cost you), you need to correct him.
