I think what you're describing is the crux of the issue for chess players who don't want to commit full-time to chess but also have problems just playing a game here and there casually because it draws them in. In other words, they’re too good to be casual but not good or dedicated enough to be full-time professionals. These people are usually chess experts with 2000+ ratings but below international master (IM) level. I, for one, played chess when I was a kid, but decided not to devote too much time to it (1800 elo), although it was a lot of fun, because I wanted to spend time with friends and I didn't want to spend too much time on chess. Over the years, I adopted the approach of trying to be in the top 10% in many different things, just for fun and interest, instead of being just in the top 0.1% in one thing.