I agree, to a point. Everything should certainly be a case-by-case basis.
We’re also in complicated times because social norms aren’t as dependable as they were, once. Family structures are changing. Roles are changing for many people. My kids experience around the home is already far different from mine, and I believe it’s the case for most of their friends as well. Family structure in 20 years could be significantly different from what it was 20 years ago. The need to evaluate case-by-case will probably only increase.
Your point about equal responsibility and equal rights is a good one. I suppose my position is that a lot of hidden labour can be responsibility, and it can often be important and overlooked. Yet, it’s not as though men never share in this, or that being a primary provider doesn’t come with its own hidden labours. For example, the insane amount of learning required to stay competitive and relevant in my role - we’d very likely have a smaller income if I didn’t fit this in and move my career forward. It’s all very complicated, nuanced stuff.
At the end of the day though, I agree. If someone isn’t actively pursuing equal responsibility for themselves and their partner, they’re likely not equally entitled.
We’re also in complicated times because social norms aren’t as dependable as they were, once. Family structures are changing. Roles are changing for many people. My kids experience around the home is already far different from mine, and I believe it’s the case for most of their friends as well. Family structure in 20 years could be significantly different from what it was 20 years ago. The need to evaluate case-by-case will probably only increase.
Your point about equal responsibility and equal rights is a good one. I suppose my position is that a lot of hidden labour can be responsibility, and it can often be important and overlooked. Yet, it’s not as though men never share in this, or that being a primary provider doesn’t come with its own hidden labours. For example, the insane amount of learning required to stay competitive and relevant in my role - we’d very likely have a smaller income if I didn’t fit this in and move my career forward. It’s all very complicated, nuanced stuff.
At the end of the day though, I agree. If someone isn’t actively pursuing equal responsibility for themselves and their partner, they’re likely not equally entitled.