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Sounds like you need to share the night shift. It isn't sustainable to work all day and have every night's sleep ruined like that. It'll get better as the baby sleeps longer and longer, but chances are that you'll get burned out before that unless you get to sleep better. We had separate beds so one of us could sleep undisturbed every night.



Yeah, we have separate beds - she sleeps in what was our room, I sleep on the couch, so I don’t disturb her when I get up to tend to the bairn.

She, I feel reasonably, points out that it was not me that spent 10 months being pregnant with our child - and she sleeps extremely soundly, to the extent that she will sleep straight through screaming and crying more often than not, which means I have to be on alert, as I never do much more than a shallow, nightmare-filled doze.

To be honest, it’s not much different to the worst periods of technical hell for my startup back in the day, when I would be yanked out of bed repeatedly to deal with Situations while being yelled at by clients.

Now my client is eight months old, and is actually considerably more patient than many of the adults I used to deal with.


I might be wrong, but sleeping in till 1pm with an 8 month old baby sounds like maybe something else may be going on.

My partner had a very difficult birth that has led to a series of mental health issues. I didn't spot these for months initially, and it took a lot for it all to come to a head and out in the open.

It was easy to miss the issues with a child to care for.


> She, I feel reasonably, points out that it was not me that spent 10 months being pregnant with our child

She is not being reasonable; your wife sounds entitled and childish.

It's not reasonable to ask someone to go without sleep while the asker gets all the sleep they need, regardless of what happened in the past.

After all, it's not as if you could stock up on sleep while she was pregnant, and now cash in those stocks, can you?


I'm sure you helped out while she was pregnant as well? Was she sleep deprived during pregnancy? This doesn't sound 'reasonable' to me.


Then definitely don't marry or have a child with that guy's wife.


in 2 months she has no excuse anymore. as a father of a 1 1/2 year old, i can relate to you. i wish you all the best.


I’d penguin up like you, too.

But it sounds like if you found nap time during the day, you’d slip right into it.




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