Side point: it really bothers me that on freebsd the ports system takes over /usr/local. I expect /usr/local to consist of things that I as admin have installed by hand, and nothing else.
You can change where packages are installed using some make.conf flags. You can then install the software anywhere you want. Your users will need to add the new path to their PATH and you'll need to set some flags in rc.conf to pick up the new rc.d path as well (so software installed through ports gets auto-started).
Then again, when you install ports you as the sysadmin are installing those by hand ...
