I found Rothfuss comically bad as a writer and Kingkiller #1 nothing more than superficial wish fulfillment aimed at teens that were bullied at school.
I have routinely seen this opinion, and I liken it to saying that Shawshank Redemption is a prison escape story.
In KKC, the reader is an observer, where the main character unreliably narrates their journey in 1st person to someone else as the young MC would have perceived it. The POV is central how you perceive the story. KKC never clicks if taken at face value. Kvothe is portrayed as a clumsy prodigy every step of the way. From the way he projects his insecurities onto his female counterpart to the chasm between how he perceives himself and how others perceive him. Young Kvothe is a mess, and old Kvothe knows it.
I can't imagine any serious reader who'd put themselves in Kvothe's shoes. KKC is not a hero story. The reader is actively discouraged against taking Kvothe's self-image as truth. His life is a disaster. Kvothe is closer to Forrest Gump or Icarus, than a Mary Sue.
IMO, it is unfair to criticize it from outside of the context that it exists in. "KKC is not grimdark enough for my liking", is stylistic preference. It isn't a shortcoming of the book that same way that "Queen's lyrics are too simple" is not a shortcoming of Queen.
I'll echo the posts you replied to and say that the current 2 books in the KKC series are by far the best fiction I've ever read. I've listened to them at least 3x each on audio (a combined ~71 hours per pass through the series), and I enjoy them in a new way each time.
I'd be curious to hear which fiction series/authors appeal to you and why.
I don't particularly like fantasy, but I have read my fair share. I've enjoyed "The Darkness that Comes Before" because I thought it was intelligently written, philosophically consistent and deep, and didn't hand-hold the reader.
These are all attributes that your average mass-market fantasy (Sanderson, Abercrombie) lacks, maybe delibaretely so in order to chase popular appeal.
The Darkness That Comes Before is stupendous. It took Bakker a decade to write, which shows. His books after are written too quickly and the introduction of dragons spoils what could have been a purely own creation free of the poisoned tropes of fantasy.
Not that Sanderson is much better.