Hi, sorry you're going through this, but you've got lots of company. My mom was diagnosed with lymphoma (cancer in lymph system), and lived 10 years with it, 9 1/2 of which were good ones.
First off, obviously, nothing makes it "ok". It is tough.
Secondly, focus on if you are doing the thing that needs doing now, and if you find your thoughts on "what do I do to fix things?" or "what if...?", gently move your thoughts back to "what is the thing that needs doing now?" Expect to have to keep doing this, and don't be impatient with yourself. Just know that your thoughts will tend to wander into questions that are not answerable, so you will need to repeatedly shift them back to doing whatever needs doing at that moment, knowing at the same time that your thoughts will wander again.
Remember to tell your mom that you love her, of course.
Also allow her to talk about whatever she wants to talk about. Sometimes she may want to talk about you, not about her cancer, just so that she can think about something else.
If mom is living with your dad, he may need to have someone to talk to when your mom is not around, so be available to him to vent/rant/process his emotions as well. In this case, you mostly just need to listen without trying to fix things or have an answer, necessarily.
If you find your emotions getting the best of you, try to calm yourself of course, but also don't get too upset at yourself either. It's normal.
First off, obviously, nothing makes it "ok". It is tough.
Secondly, focus on if you are doing the thing that needs doing now, and if you find your thoughts on "what do I do to fix things?" or "what if...?", gently move your thoughts back to "what is the thing that needs doing now?" Expect to have to keep doing this, and don't be impatient with yourself. Just know that your thoughts will tend to wander into questions that are not answerable, so you will need to repeatedly shift them back to doing whatever needs doing at that moment, knowing at the same time that your thoughts will wander again.
Remember to tell your mom that you love her, of course.
Also allow her to talk about whatever she wants to talk about. Sometimes she may want to talk about you, not about her cancer, just so that she can think about something else.
If mom is living with your dad, he may need to have someone to talk to when your mom is not around, so be available to him to vent/rant/process his emotions as well. In this case, you mostly just need to listen without trying to fix things or have an answer, necessarily.
If you find your emotions getting the best of you, try to calm yourself of course, but also don't get too upset at yourself either. It's normal.