First off, it sucks to feel trapped and anxious. I’m sorry.
Your story sounds somewhat common on HN- lack of formal education credential, degree of isolation socially, and emotional/mental health problems.
Do you have a mentor/coach type figure you can talk to? Someone that you aren’t trying to get a job from, but who can talk to about the non-tech parts of working?
What are you doing in your non-working hours? You said you are down to one friend. I suspect that being more social would help your mental state and work on those important social skills. In my 20s I met friends though social sports leagues (bocce ball, dodgeball, etc…), and in my 30s through service organizations/volunteering. These are nice frameworks for meeting people because they give you a shared sense of identity and commonality out of the box. Remember to be generous in how you interact with people, smile and laugh a lot, and that they are probably awkwardly seeking friends too.
Apologies if you hear this all the time. If interested, I’d like to hear your story and maybe do some mentoring. I’m (my hn username) at outlook.com
Your story sounds somewhat common on HN- lack of formal education credential, degree of isolation socially, and emotional/mental health problems.
Do you have a mentor/coach type figure you can talk to? Someone that you aren’t trying to get a job from, but who can talk to about the non-tech parts of working?
What are you doing in your non-working hours? You said you are down to one friend. I suspect that being more social would help your mental state and work on those important social skills. In my 20s I met friends though social sports leagues (bocce ball, dodgeball, etc…), and in my 30s through service organizations/volunteering. These are nice frameworks for meeting people because they give you a shared sense of identity and commonality out of the box. Remember to be generous in how you interact with people, smile and laugh a lot, and that they are probably awkwardly seeking friends too.
Apologies if you hear this all the time. If interested, I’d like to hear your story and maybe do some mentoring. I’m (my hn username) at outlook.com