What a reasonable and not-at-all unhinged threat model. I should be kept up at night worried that currency counterfeiters will break into my house, steal my printer, use it to print fake money, the cops will find that money, use these dots to get metadata to find me, then what no-knock raid me?
idk I think I'll just accept that risk, it's a lot more likely that my ex will stab me after all
These types of threat models require a bit of creative flair:
0315 am, a drone flies over your house and hovers just long enough to upload firmware to your WiFi-enabled printer. Having not memorized your printers serial number, and certainly not checking it every day, you don’t notice the new firmware or orientation of dots.
Your printer, along with an identical model bought later and cloned to yours, are now forensically indistinguishable. Your printer driver phones TonerCo for a refill. It arrives with the fanfare of fast shipping.
11 months later, your address and credit card purchase are enough to convince the right judge to grant a no-knock warrant. Your printer has embroiled you, or someone just as innocent as you, in a very bad time.
