You absolutely have the right to not board an aircraft if you don't feel safe, and should exercise it. Laurence Gonzales has a story about declining to fly on a DC-10, which saved his life. But even he admits that that decision wasn't rational: you can't judge a decision by what you know after the fact. Even at its worst, a flight on a DC-10 was much safer than his morning commute.
You'll have less luck getting a refund for that decision, but I do appreciate your admitting that the decision is about your feelings, not demonstrable evidence.
I'm just a consumer making decisions on behalf of myself and my family, and exercising what little power I have.
"We have a process" is little reassurance when every step of said process failed.
I have a process, too. When I feel safe, I board an airplane. When I don't feel safe, I don't board it and demand a refund from the airline.