I'm 45 and got my first tech job at 38. Before that, I had been homeless for 2 years, from which I have PTSD. My first tech job was for $70k and no stock in SoCal. From there, I went to a startup making $105k with some worthless stock options to another startup making $140k with some more worthless stock options, to my current gig at a public company making about $210k with RSUs that are real money.
I got fired from the first 3 jobs because my PTSD got the better of me. Whenever I feel the slightest bit insecure at work, my anxiety instantly goes through the roof. I've been seeing a therapist for the past 6 or 7 years who's helped me immensely, but this whole forced WFH and inability to do anything outside of home is causing my anxiety to skyrocket. I recently had to take almost a month off to deal with it.
In spite of all that, I think I'm in the best place I've ever been with the PTSD and anxiety. Until I got my third tech job, I hadn't been able to put a meaningful amount of money away. At that third job was when I finally started feeling somewhat financially secure, because I'd put together a 6 month emergency fund.
After I got fired from that job, a 5 month job search ensued. By cutting expenses and applying for unemployment benefits, I had managed to only burn through 2/3 of that money, but, boy, was I just constantly triggered for about the last 3.5 months of the search.
My triggers are mostly based on financial security. When I feel like work isn't going well, I still see myself getting fired and ending up homeless, even though in the past year, I've managed to put away over a years' worth of expenses in savings and investment accounts that I can tap if I need to. Add on the stress of COVID and a general feeling of unproductivity at home, and, well, let's just say I'm feeling the strain, even after that entire month off work.
If we weren't going through both a plague and Great Depression II at the same time, and I could go into an office to work with my team, I'd probably be doing fine, just like I was before everything hit. Besides taking time off, I've been making sure to see my therapist regularly, seen a psychiatrist, and started taking CBD, magnesium, and GABA supplements, in addition to the vitamin D I take regularly.
All that, plus the support of my girlfriend, who's also lucky enough to still have her job working from home is pretty much what's keeping me together right now.
Other than COVID and WFH, there's also the fact that I'm a 45 year old software engineer. Let's just say I'm not looking forward to my next couple of job searches.
I got fired from the first 3 jobs because my PTSD got the better of me. Whenever I feel the slightest bit insecure at work, my anxiety instantly goes through the roof. I've been seeing a therapist for the past 6 or 7 years who's helped me immensely, but this whole forced WFH and inability to do anything outside of home is causing my anxiety to skyrocket. I recently had to take almost a month off to deal with it.
In spite of all that, I think I'm in the best place I've ever been with the PTSD and anxiety. Until I got my third tech job, I hadn't been able to put a meaningful amount of money away. At that third job was when I finally started feeling somewhat financially secure, because I'd put together a 6 month emergency fund.
After I got fired from that job, a 5 month job search ensued. By cutting expenses and applying for unemployment benefits, I had managed to only burn through 2/3 of that money, but, boy, was I just constantly triggered for about the last 3.5 months of the search.
My triggers are mostly based on financial security. When I feel like work isn't going well, I still see myself getting fired and ending up homeless, even though in the past year, I've managed to put away over a years' worth of expenses in savings and investment accounts that I can tap if I need to. Add on the stress of COVID and a general feeling of unproductivity at home, and, well, let's just say I'm feeling the strain, even after that entire month off work.
If we weren't going through both a plague and Great Depression II at the same time, and I could go into an office to work with my team, I'd probably be doing fine, just like I was before everything hit. Besides taking time off, I've been making sure to see my therapist regularly, seen a psychiatrist, and started taking CBD, magnesium, and GABA supplements, in addition to the vitamin D I take regularly.
All that, plus the support of my girlfriend, who's also lucky enough to still have her job working from home is pretty much what's keeping me together right now.
Other than COVID and WFH, there's also the fact that I'm a 45 year old software engineer. Let's just say I'm not looking forward to my next couple of job searches.