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> I would consider it more believable if they seemed more 'congruent'.

Why?

Social norms were very different for regular people, imagine being the emperor, especially Nero, whose family history make GOT look like a family camping...

Another example is Elagabalus, who is considered the first example of a transgender emperor in history.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elagabalus

In ancient times homosexuality wasn't a problem at all.

Just look at Greek history



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