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> So how can I tell?

In communication as the recipient your job is to try to understand what is meant, not what is said.

Conversely, as the communicator, your job is to say what you mean, and ensure what is said is in line with what is meant. The added complexity is that to do this you need to have a decent grasp on what recipients will hear (as in "understand intent," as opposed to the literal words that they physically hear)



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