You exhale about 1kg of CO2 per day, 27% of it is carbon. Have you ever noticed your plants gaining 300g of matter per day? You need enormous quantities of chloroplast life in your house to help you - and to constantly shovel excess out, impractical.
I have heard about some people keeping an aquarium (with growth lights) full of algae and they swear by it, but maintenance is high.
A trick could be to have the first 30 seconds or minute of your song at a low amplitude. This will force them to manually increase the volume of their device so they can hear anything. After that initial quiet phase of your song, you can ramp up the volume to the original level! More louder!
Seems like HN policy is that all death announcements get the "John Doe Has Died" title. Probably makes it easier to avoid weird comment threads proclaiming that "John Doe didn't really invent the robotic sex doll!" or what have you.
Did want to point out some other cheap/free bitcrushers out there for people to try (in addition to MAIM)
https://www.deniseaudio.com/plugins/my-crush is currently free with newsletter sub and was super cheap when I first purchased it.
Some other free vst of note https://bedroomproducersblog.com/2012/03/09/bpb-freeware-stu...
I also like https://camelcrusher.com/