One of the most complex areas, having lots of users, that need to be fixed, is human beings. Spend all your time to know who you are, why you are like that, and change this world starting from the most promising thing it has on it: you.
In the meantime, try to carry out activities that you like (ride your bike, walk alone or with real people). Do it disconnected from any device or social network.
Do things that make you feel real and unique, without layout, template, guidelines, best practices. Ignore any negativism (fortunately you are introverted, it should help). Recognize in every moment that you have to learn a lot. Learn a lot and repeat.
"The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man."
After more than three decades in corporate life, I have "dropped out," and I'm working on doing stuff that makes me feel good.
Being happy is a lot more important to me than toys; but I have a company that provides the kinds of toys I like to play with, anyway.
I've been focusing on re-establishing my working engineering cred; mostly by creating a pretty vast portfolio of new, relevant projects. It will be the kind of thing that you won't be able to ignore.
Which will be quite important, as my gray hair causes an almost instant "write off" response.
The last couple of years have also given me great opportunity to reinvest in my own self-development.
I'm not really big on the "unplug yourself" advice. My GH ID is an almost solid green. I've been doing seven-day workweeks for a couple of years, and actually enjoying myself (and not making a dime).
Sooner or later, I'll have to slow down the hamster wheel, but I'm not there, yet. If I expect people to pay me real money for real work; I need to make sure the product (myself) is tip-top shape.
If I do that, then everything else kinda falls into place.
I think you're missing a key ingredient--your network of colleagues. I don't think companies care that much about technical skills after a certain level. The way you get work is by having associates who know you and can get you in.
You are correct, but there's a couple of mitigating factors in this:
1) I have a fairly substantial network, but most of them know me as a manager, not a tech. I'm an excellent manager (people still ask me for advice), but I don't love it. I love being a coder.
2) Of the fairly substantial coding work I've done, almost all of the work (that I can talk about) was done for NPOs, as open-source for organizations that don't have a pot to pee in, so that network is a bit dicey for me.
I am doing something that is not usual. I'm reinventing myself in-place. I've done it before, but that was back when we actually respected folks with gray hair. Running into the ageism issue has been...enlightening.
I'm also not very good at pitches. I do demos; which means no pigs in pokes. I tend to not take the wraps off of things until they have reached the MVP stage, and I'm not particularly interested in getting funding.
I just want to do what I love: write code. I'm an excellent architect. My systems tend to last for decades, but that isn't really something that folks care about, and I understand that. I need to re-tool my architecture focus as well.
I have history writing demos that can't be ignored. I'll need to build a new network, but I can't do that until I have something to show (not talk about -SHOW).
This is some of the best advice I've ever read on HN. I started doing this about 6 months ago. I also want to warn that you can focus too much on that and it can burn you out. Moderation is key in any decision/lifestyle. Also can say self love and compassion is key as well and can take a long time to develop depending on the parenting you received.
This is good advice, but frequently one of the best ways to work on yourself is to pick a promising area and work hard on it. Your self does not exist in a vacuum, and you learn a lot about you by how you choose to navigate the world around you.
Hey. I am 22 (from India), suffering from depression and with zero skills which can get me a job. I have wasted last 4-5 years without doing anything or learning anything. All i do is sleep, laying on bed and daydream through out the day. Can you tell me how should i go about improving my life?
Like the other poster suggested, consider seeking help from a counsellor. Depending on which part of India you are in there is a good chance of finding someone who suits you.
Since you are on HN, I’m guessing you are aiming for a tech career. The good thing with tech is that it is so widespread now that you can pick any niche and you’ll be able to work in that domain. Feel free to reach out to me (contact in bio) if you would like to discuss about tech in India / Bangalore.
Hi, sorry for the delay.
No. I can't tell you how to improve your life. But if you like to play chess with me (a beginner), grab my contact from the bio. I'll be there.
Anything in this world has a value you have to pay.
Money comes at the right time if you go the right path in your life.
Don't think about money, think about the path you want to go, a path you would be happy to go and money comes in its right time
Choose "infinite" goals in your life, and follow them.
And likewise, it's hard (though I guess not impossible) to achieve that Zen when you can't afford food or shelter. Maslow's hierarchy of needs and all that.
I understand what you say, the world is not fair and some of us, including me, have started from zero and should have basic needs in our life.
However, I don't think spending time, for instance, 30-60 min a day for things we love to be hard
I call myself constant learner, some years ago I said if Japanese people improved their country through small changes rule (10 min a day) what if I spend 1-3 hours a day for things I really love to follow?
Also read this book [1]: Linchpin: Are You Indispensable? How to drive your career and create a remarkable future
Since you bring it up, mental health companies are springing up left and right. I work at a mental health startup myself. My interest in understanding and working on my own mental health led me to apply to this place. I think there are a lot of people attempting to create products to help us do what you are suggesting. Meditation, mindfulness and therapy seem to be the solutions that everyone is throwing up.
The trend of positivity focused, directionless hedonism seeking self actualization is no better than lying around drinking all day or addicted to opiates.
Find something outside yourself to be devoted to. Do the hard work to determine what that is, test and iterate.
Happiness is a side effect of a job well done, not a goal.
As I get older I tend to agree with this more and more. Find something bigger than yourself. This could be your family, your company, your idea. Work on that. Build something significant, something you can be proud of. It will give your life more meaning than attempts to find out who you are.
I'd love to know why you think you know what's better or worse for a stranger on the internet. Have you discovered objective reality that completely accounts for every subjective experience of every human being and can conclusively prove what is better or worse?
My, those foolish philosophers and scientists can finally retire - Andrew Kemendo has arrived, we just need to listen and do as he/she says.
One of the most complex areas, having lots of users, that need to be fixed, is human beings. Spend all your time to know who you are, why you are like that, and change this world starting from the most promising thing it has on it: you.
In the meantime, try to carry out activities that you like (ride your bike, walk alone or with real people). Do it disconnected from any device or social network.
Do things that make you feel real and unique, without layout, template, guidelines, best practices. Ignore any negativism (fortunately you are introverted, it should help). Recognize in every moment that you have to learn a lot. Learn a lot and repeat.